Dear Younger Me

Photo by Cris Trung on Unsplash

Photo by Lacie Slezak on Unsplash

Photo by Sarah Comeau on Unsplash

Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash

To start, I am not “telling you what to do.” I know how much you hate that, you still do. These are purely some insights I have gained over the years... that you taught me.

People will tell you, often, that you are “too much.”

Fuck them. They are not enough. This happens when dealing with weak people. Don’t take too much time with these. You are enough and that scares people when you know it. You do know it, it is just scary to admit because we have been taught to think we are less. Be loud, be honest, it's who you know to be. Speak up and tell your crazy stories and share your life. Inform people how you sincerely feel and don’t mess with their feelings. Thankfully, you are a crappy liar and honesty flows out of you without your control. Through this your real friends will come and stay with you.

Keep loving as hard as you do.

This is one of the greatest things about you. You are not afraid to love.This leads you to the greatest relationship with yourself. It is hard at times, but with this as your foundation it always come back to you. Love with your heart on your sleeve. It will hurt, but these pains teach you more than you imagined possible. It also brings you extreme happiness and pure bliss. You learn what you truly want and what you are not willing to put up with. Keep your heart open and let it guide you.

Trust yourself.

You get good at this. You just need to realize that you've had it all along. That gouging pain in  your belly that freaks out in certain situations knows what’s up. Listen to that. Get quiet and listen to yourself. You know what to do but sometimes you ignore yourself. Stop that and sit in silence, you’ll figure it out.

When people tell you something about themselves, believe them.

This one takes a while to learn. Trying to change someone never works. Ever. Whether it is a roommate, family member, significant other or your dog… it doesn’t work out. Love them for who they are and be OK with it or leave. It is that simple… except, bring the dog, just don’t let them run around unattended. It's not their fault and they love you unconditionally.

Travel.

This one is a bit scary at first but it is worth it. Coming from such a small town it is quite intimidating, but do it. You meet others that are just like you but on the other side of the world. This creates an understanding that we are truly all the same. We laugh at fart jokes, cry when in pain and love knowing we are not alone in this world. Seriously though, you meet some of the greatest people in your life on these adventures.

Dance.

You are not necessarily “good” at this activity but it feels amazing. Thankfully you started young and became comfortable with not knowing what to do but still trying. Go to all the concerts and worship the feels that live music gives you. Rock out in your underwear at home. (This one actually proves to be great therapy.) Cry and scream when it moves you to. Dance with life as your partner.

Fail.

Don’t worry, you are great at this one. Trial and error is actually the way you live, so get used to it. When you try things and it goes all wrong it truly teaches you more than simply getting it right the first time. Get comfortable with failure and learn to embrace it. Everyone goes through this but rarely shares it. They did not simply get great at things. They failed, a lot more than you think. It is such a shitty way to get to the good stuff, but I assure you that it works out.

You can do hard things.

Sometimes life sucks… like sucks more than you ever thought possible. And I will tell you that you haven’t been through the extremely tough things yet. It gets really hard.  Kicks you when you’re down and then leaves you in holes of darkness with no way out in sight. But you get through it. I promise. Keep holding on to that light and love inside. Keep feeding that part of you that gives you strength and it will pull you up and out of it. Keep going.

You are already one of the great ones in this world, and it gets better. You find the greatest love of your life in a man you never expected. You see many countries and try some of the best foods you will ever come across. You create a community of people that support and challenge you in ways to help create the best version of yourself.

Life is a dazzling place to learn who you are. Trip and stumble along the way but pick yourself up. Don’t hold on too strongly to expectations of yourself or others.  Look at the dark parts of your soul and let your own light in. Love to stay in and go out. Give your loved ones some extra cuddles, especially Kapay and Clementine. Stop and marvel at the greatness of your life and do so often. Things pass quickly and be sure to hold onto the lovely moments you get to experience.

Love,

Your Future Self

P.S. Although these are great stories later in life, here are some quick tips: bring extra soap when hiking Machu Picchu,if you suspect he is a tool… he is, stop and fix your bag off your bike as you speed to work, find Brad earlier, get out in nature more (especially barefoot), stay away from hay, and learn to love the small things… they add up.